Slobb Deep release tomorrow 8/26/08

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Summer of Survival

I made a vow to read more books about mountain climbing this summer. I planned my literary equivalent of the "Seven Summits" to take place over the months of July and August. Unfortunately, I couldn't find one of my selections (I know it's somewhere in this damn apartment!), and the reading list theme became survival. Here they are...

Forever on the Mountain by James M. Tabor (2007)
This one's an account of the 1967 expedition on Mount McKinley (Denali) that killed seven American climbers. Not particularly well-written, and devastatingly depressing. Twelve guys went out on a somewhat foolish mission, and found that they didn't get along at all. Reminds me a bit of a European tour I did about 12 years ago.
I didn't realize Denali was considered such a difficult climb. Its location makes it much colder and stormier than most of the other major mountains.

K2 - The Savage Mountain by Charles S. Houston and Robert H. Bates (1954)
I really liked this one, perhaps because everybody seemed to get along so well. This expedition had the usual troubles people have when they try to climb a 28,000 foot mountain: lousy weather, sicknesses and death. Wonderfully dry and descriptive-- totally fifties.

Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer (1997)
I've probably read this book a dozen times, but I read it again anyway! Krakauer really knows how to keep a reader's attention. He also specializes in hilarious, almost Penthouse Forum-esque descriptions ("As the glacier inched over humps and dips in the Cwm's underlying strata, it fractured into countless vertical fissures-- crevasses."). A fantastic book about an insane couple of weeks.
Related reading: Eiger Dreams by Jon Krakauer

Touching the Void by Joe Simpson (1988)
This could very well be the ultimate story of survival. I wasn't crazy about the film version, but the book is excellent. Simpson's italicized inner voice gets a little annoying, but I'm willing to give the guy a little rope here (oof!). Made me never want to try anything like this stuff.

No Shortcuts to the Top by Ed Viesturs (2006)
Refreshingly different in style from the other books, this is basically an autobiography by an average writer. Ed just tells it like it is (by page 23 he's already recounted his base camp shag of the late alpine siren Chantal Mauduit), with no frills. This book's print is impossibly tiny, almost like an enormous footnote. I thought I was suffering from hypoxia in my own bed.
Ed Viesturs climbed each of the world's fourteen peaks of 8000M or higher without supplementary oxygen. Ed's a bad mutha.

Deep Survival by Laurence Gonzales (2003)
I was hoping for a treasure trove assortment of survival tales, a literary version of the TV show "I Survived". There's plenty of good stuff here, but Gonzales is more concerned with the theory of survival. Occasionally interesting, but not what I was looking for.
Related reading: Normal Accidents by Charles Perrow, Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer

The Road by Cormac McCarthy (2006)
This wasn't supposed to be part of my series (it has nothing to do with mountain climbing), but it has everything to do with survival. Easily the best book I've read in years. Devastating.

PavanoWatch VI

This is getting ridiculous-- a MazzolaWatch would probably be in order at this point.

Anyway, Carl won. Let's hope it's not the last time. This has taken me at least 25 minutes to type...

Men's Taekwondo

OK, I've been a bit lax on the Olympics coverage lately... that doesn't mean I haven't been watching. In the last couple of days I've watched basketball (kinda lame), beach volleyball (!), kayaking and canoeing (awesome), diving (terrifying), horse jumping, or "equestrian" (weird), tons of gymnastics (can't get enough), rhythmic gymnastics (got enough quickly), ping pong, or "table tennis" (totally weird), triathlon (cool but seems fixed), and tons of other track & field (jeez! the girls in r.g. can throw batons forty feet in the air and catch them-- what's up with the relay teams?). I missed women's soccer but I'm becoming obsessed with Hope Solo.

Anyway, an angry Cuban kicked a judge in the face in the Taekwondo bronze medal match. The perpetrator may be banned for life from the sport-- the secretary general of the World Taekwondo Federation called the act "an insult to mankind." The guy's leg must be 4 or 5 feet long!

Monsters of Prog Rock

Chuck Simone's recent work in Left Field inspired me to put together a prog piece of my own. If you're looking for credentials...

1) I served after-school detention in middle school and high school for scrawling Pete Frame-esque family trees of Genesis, Roxy Music, etc. on tables and chairs in numerous classrooms. My later efforts included full credentials for Phil Manzanera and Tony Levin.

2) I used to intentionally dress like Tony Banks (I have pictures!).

3) Roger fucking Dean.

4) I had hundreds of pencils engraved with the title of my (then) favorite King Crimson record.

I'm only including UK bands from 1968 to 1974 here, so Rush is clearly not eligible. And don't come at me with the Krautrock thing-- I didn't know anyone into Neu! or Faust way back, and neither did you. Let's stick with bands that actually sold some records, eh?

In all seriousness, the '68-'74 timeframe fits all bands below like a glove except one. In all fairness, nothing fits that band like a glove except the lead singer's trousers anyway.

Genesis

I almost got beat up a few times for liking these guys, and I'm damn proud of it. I also once tried in vain to convince a bunch of stoners that the cover of Trespass was spookier than any Sabbath cover. I didn't bother putting the record on.

It's easy to forget how fucking weird these guys were before Phil Collins (and Peter Gabriel!) absolutely exploded over the airwaves. I mean, how many people out there actually think of Phil as a drummer and PG as a bunch of bananas?! Art rock extraordinaire.

Classic: The Lamb Dies Down on Broadway (1974)

Close: Nursery Cryme (1971)

Collection: Genesis Archives, Vol. 1: 1967-1975 (1998)

Crap: We Can't Dance (1991)

Yes

The biggest and blowiest of the bunch. Their catalog ranges from jaw-droppingly powerful to mind-bogglingly awful. Jon Anderson would certainly lose in a battle royale between all lead singers named here, unless he was permitted to use his druidic spellbook.

Classic: Fragile (1972)

Close: The Yes Album (1971)

Collection: Classic Yes (1981)

Crap: Tormato (1978)

King Crimson

The dark horses of the crew-- easily the least commercial and most consistently obtuse. Is their lack of "success" due to vocal musical chairs? Tyrannical band dictatorship? Time signatures that read like Mersenne primes?

Like Genesis and Yes, Crimso radically redefined themselves in anticipation of the 80's, but mistakenly chose Adrian Belew as a cash cow over Trevor Rabin and the Phenix Horns. However, indie rockers would eventually queue up in droves to buy anything that sounded like John Wetton's bass guitar.

Classic: In the Court of the Crimson King (1969) [tough call!]

Close: Larks' Tongues in Aspic (1973)

Collection: A Young Person's Guide to King Crimson (1976) [out of print]

Crap: any CD's not remastered

Jethro Tull

These guys have almost nothing in common with the others here. They never recorded for Atlantic Records and didn't have Bill Bruford's phone number. Most of the UK proggers were Beatle-heads, while these blokes were jamming on blues riffs and opening for Sabbath. If we had a Monsters of Prog Rock party, Tull would be drinking beer by themselves in the corner while Ian Anderson hopped around making dick jokes.

Classic: Aqualung (1971)

Close: Stand Up (1969)

Collection: Living in the Past (1972)

Crap: The Broadsword and the Beast (1982)

Emerson, Lake & Palmer

My least favorite of the fab five, but the most likely to be heard at a major sporting event (although I swear I heard "Thela Hun Ginjeet" in the Bronx bleachers on Robitussin once). Fared worst in the 80's as well-- I'll take Crest of a Knave over "Touch and Go" any day of the week.

Classic: Brain Salad Surgery (1973)

Close: Trilogy (1972)

Collection: The Best of Emerson, Lake & Palmer (1980)

Crap: Love Beach (1978)

PavanoWatch V

It's official-- Carl Pavano is scheduled to pitch against the Orioles this Saturday.

Carl was chosen over several other rare- and ne'er-do-wells: Phil Hughes (flu), Kei Igawa (sucks), Eric Milton (still rehabbing), and Victor Zambrano (still rehabbing and sucks).

He'll have his work cut out for him. In addition to making it to the park, warming up, and navigating his way to the mound, Pavano will be facing the O's Jeremy Guthrie, who's only allowed 8 runs in his last six starts.

Men's Springboard Diving

I guess we can say that China is dominating the diving events this year. They've won all the gold medals.

He Chong just kicked some serious Speedo ass. in his words, "I'm very, very, very happy about my performance." I'd call him the Usain Bolt of diving, but that conjures up images of Chong with his bathing suit half peeled off, doing a cannonball on his last dive.

American Troy Dumais ended up with the dreaded "Devil's Dive"-- he placed 6th in three consecutive Olympiads. Dumais shapeshifted into an asp and slithered into a drain pipe upon learning of his sixth place finish.
I dunno, watching the guys shower after a dive is a little weird. The showers seem pretty nice, however.

PavanoWatch IV

The Yankees web site says it brilliantly: Yanks will bring someone up Saturday.

We all figured Hughes would get the nod over ol' Carl, but Phil's rough start yesterday cast a bit of doubt (3.2 IP, 5 R, 8 H). Pavano, on the other hand, had a nice 6-inning 1-run effort of his own.

So who's it gonna be? I think they'll be anxious to settle this Pavano thing once and for all-- if he stinks up Camden Yards, it might provide some closure to the strange saga. If he does OK, then he does OK.

career Yankee numbers for Hughes: 5-7, 94.2 IP, 5.51 ERA
career Yankee numbers for Pavano: 5-6, 111.1 IP, 4.77 ERA

I won't delve into their salaries.

Men's and Women's Swimming

This has been the most exciting part of the games for me (besides watching Misty May-Treanor's ass jiggling in the sand). Not just because of Phelps, I claim.

Don't get me wrong, Michael Phelps has been as riveting as anything I've seen in a while (except for Misty May-Treanor's...just kidding!), but the real draw for me has been the supporting cast of characters.

I've loved every race I've seen so far, and I've seen a lot of 'em. Ryan Lochte, Aaron Peirsol, Jason Lesak, Kosuke Kitajima, Natalie Coughlin, Libby Trickett, Kirsty Coventry... really good stuff.

The graphics and the camera shots under the pool have been awesome too. Superb job by NBC. Oh, and Michael Phelps.

Yankees 3, Royals 2

Jeez, we stink.

The Yankees seem completely unable and unwilling to move runners over and get runners home. Today was hard to take.

The crowd was completely dead today. The game had the feel of a painfully long rain delay kind of thing, where the Stadium's empty and you can hear a pin drop.Except that the game was sold out, packed, and tied up.

Of course, I never got my Yankee Luggage Tag. You gotta get there during batting practice to get a promotional item these days. They actually looked kinda nice-- could've used one a few days ago.

We did manage to give A-Rod a sound booing, and probably would have razzed Giambi a bit more if he wasn't removed from the basepaths.

Anyway, I left before this one even ended. I had a funny feeling we'd pull it out, but the "at-the-game vs. hang-out-with-L.J." factor was shrinking by the minute. Glad I went home.